In dating, it is said, “there are more good women out there than men”. I am inclined to disagree. Moreover, I look at this as a double standard of sorts. I believe men and women go through the same things from different perspectives. Unless you’re going to look at the literal number of men and women on the planet, and say “mathematically, men have more options out there than women”, and provide all the statistical analysis, SAVE IT. You find me a man who has left a woman because the relationship wasn’t good for him, and I’ll show you a woman who was in a relationship that wasn’t good for her.

See what I did there?

For whatever reason, when relationships don’t work out, it is because life has something else in store for all parties involved. Whether or not the very next person they talk to is an “upgrade” from the last, is irrelevant. Whether you feel like I should replace “life” in the previous sentence with God, or Karma, or the Universe, is also irrelevant. Facts are just facts, and to assume that men are the reason why relationships don’t work is only looking at relationships from one point of view. Men that are happy within their relationships, because they feel they can be themselves, come home to a place of peace, and have a partner and friend in the woman they love, do more to preserve their relationships than they do to destroy them. The previous statement would hold up, equally, if applied to women, and neither party within the relationship will be immune to mistakes.

I’ll leave you with one more fact. Honesty balances us. Embrace truth, in love. You know a person loves you when they know your honest, ugly truth, and they love you anyway. When you find someone who loves you that way…Hold on to them, make excuses for them to others, and tell them the truth about their ugly truth. Growing together, instead of growing apart requires honesty from the ones we love. The kind of honesty that gives us balance. Never settling for someone who doesn’t live up to your standard, or worse their own standard, doesn’t mean you run away. It means you block out outside distractions, lock each other in a room, and shine a spotlight on the issues to have constructive conversations, with the obvious intent to make each other better. To reject solutions in our relationships, is to embrace the problems in our relationships. Men and women are guilty of these sins against their relationships, and are equally unfit to be in them. Let’s stop saying there are more good women out there than men. It will be one less lie that we make our truth.